Man's Take Magazine

Long Island Iced Tea – Monthly Manly Drink

This Issue’s Manliest Drink is…

The Long Island Iced Tea

The genius who invented this liberal libation must have had a promising career in as a chemist. Who would ever think to combine rum, vodka, gin, triple sec, and above all tequila? Who could imagine this mixture as something you’d want to put into your body instead of the gas tank of your car? I’m sure our brilliant scientist drank himself into a stupor shortly after completing his invention.

You should be warned, this is a potent drink and despite its laundry list of strong spirits, it tastes pretty good when made correctly. The most manly thing about it is that to make one properly you need to pour in five full shots of liquor. That’s manly enough for me.  Yet it tastes good enough that you can share it with your girl, or your friend’s girl, or some random chick a bar.

It’s quite a miracle of mixology that this blend of clear spirits doesn’t taste vile. It actually does taste more like iced tea than rocket fuel, though by all rights it should work as a susbstitute for liquid rocket propellant.

Not all Long Island Iced Tea is created equally. There are two distinct ways to ruin your drink. The first is with bad sour mix. Don’t use powdered mixes or cheap pre-packaged mixers. Get a good quality sour mix, or mix up your own with some lemon juice and sugar. 

The second thing that will ruin a long island iced tea is using the wrong kind of tequila. Clearly a high quality pure agave tequila will be best, but you can get away with cheaper white tequila. Don’t use cheap gold tequila. If you use cheap tequila I suggest you only use half the recommended amount. If you get high quality tequila you can toss the whole shot in and take one for yourself as you mix the drink.

There are several variants out there resembling this drink. Most notable is probably the Long Beach Tea, which is the same drink only substituting cranberry juice instead of cola. This is an acceptable switch because it preserves the five clear spirits that make up the foundation of the drink. Of course it may make the drink slightly pink in color, but if you drink it fast enough no one will notice the color.

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